It feels like it's been forever since I've updated on my mission. Things are going beautifully, she hasn't had any formula since I announced that she was formula free.
We've been going all sorts of places recently, and I have to admit that it is much easier not to have to estimate how many bottles she will need or carry around dirty bottles after they've been used or finding a dirty bottle that had rolled under a seat the week before. There are no more bottle counts before we do dishes and it is amazingly liberating.
I've also been working on building a freezer stash. I managed to freeze two feedings this weekend and it feels so nice to know that I can soon go out on my own without worrying about having enough milk stored away for her. Although I do have to admit that pumping is the last thing that I want to do after a long day.
Monday, October 31, 2011
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Formula Free
Yesterday marked the first day of being formula free! It's pretty amazing that we've went from exclusively formula to breast milk only in one month and one day.
Unfortunately, Avery is probably going to have to get some formula this evening. I'm headed out to do some once a month cooking and won't be able to take Avery. Since I don't yet have a freezer stash, it looks like we'll have to supplement if she happens to get hungry while I'm gone.
Unfortunately, Avery is probably going to have to get some formula this evening. I'm headed out to do some once a month cooking and won't be able to take Avery. Since I don't yet have a freezer stash, it looks like we'll have to supplement if she happens to get hungry while I'm gone.
Monday, October 10, 2011
Avery and I went to our regular La Leche League meeting this morning which definitely boosted my motivation. Once again, I was the only member because it's a new group, but it's so helpful to keep going. Luckily, there was a second leader who attended who is a certified lactation consultant so I scored some extra help! She also brought all sorts of material for local events and even some information about a local baby wearing group at a breastfeeding store (is this baby gold or what?).
In other news, I have a feeling that Avery will be exclusively breastfed pretty soon. I definitely can't wait!
In other news, I have a feeling that Avery will be exclusively breastfed pretty soon. I definitely can't wait!
Our Progress
Well, the chart didn't show as much progress as I had hoped but I do have news of a great success that happened over the weekend. Avery only drank 1 4oz bottle last night and I was able to pump almost 3 1/2 ounces after she went to bed. If I can just manage to pump the extra 1/2 ounce, I'll be able to swap out that extra formula for milk.
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
We have weight gain!
Yes, that's right! There was some concern at the last appointment with the lactation consultant that Avery was not getting enough to eat therefore not gaining as much as she should. This seriously sounds like I was starving my kid, which I assure you I am not. My husband and I agreed that if she continues to lose weight or not gain like she should, that this would stop because it's so important for her to grow. I was told to hope for 1/2 an ounce of weight gain everyday but it looks like she gained a hearty 0.7 ounces per day. It looks like we're going to be able to stick with this!
Sunday, October 2, 2011
Change of Plans
The Mr. and I took Avery camping this weekend. Not only was it a chance to relax for a couple of days, it was an opportunity to nurse her as much as she needed without any distractions. It went really well on Saturday and Sunday was not as good but still very successful.
I also had an idea about my goals as far as breastfeeding and I think that I can show my progress in a better way. I was thinking last night that breastfed babies don't have specific meals (when compared to those who are formula fed) so factoring in how many meals of formula she is no longer having isn't going to work so well. Instead, I figured that I can chart how many ounces she eats every day and then look at our progress for the week. So, every weekend, I'll be adding our progress to the blog with a chart. Hopefully this gives me an idea of how much she is getting from me rather than from formula.
I also had an idea about my goals as far as breastfeeding and I think that I can show my progress in a better way. I was thinking last night that breastfed babies don't have specific meals (when compared to those who are formula fed) so factoring in how many meals of formula she is no longer having isn't going to work so well. Instead, I figured that I can chart how many ounces she eats every day and then look at our progress for the week. So, every weekend, I'll be adding our progress to the blog with a chart. Hopefully this gives me an idea of how much she is getting from me rather than from formula.
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
La Leche Letdown
Last night I went to a different La Leche League meeting in order to hear some new perspectives. Unfortunately, it really wasn't the group for me. I guess I'll just have to keep trying. Hopefully it's not like this at other meetings, but I really felt that they judged women who had drugs during childbirth or used formula. Honestly, I realize that they're not absolutely the best things in the world, but there are millions of things that are much worse. It just seems so sad that these women are spending so much energy on judging others who do things differently rather than focusing the meeting on how they can help women who might need a little extra help. So, I guess I keep looking for a new group.
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Goals
My original plan of action was to put her to the breast whenever she was hungry and then "top her off" with hopefully pumped milk or usually formula. While it was working, I still had no idea how much milk she was actually consuming.
I've already been at this for a few weeks and while I know she is taking in more milk than when I started, but how much more? I've decided to make goals for myself in order to measure how successful my body is becoming at relactating. What kind of goals? Every successful goal is another feeding that is completely replaced by my milk. Coincidentally, I met my first goal today! Hopefully this is the start of something!
I've already been at this for a few weeks and while I know she is taking in more milk than when I started, but how much more? I've decided to make goals for myself in order to measure how successful my body is becoming at relactating. What kind of goals? Every successful goal is another feeding that is completely replaced by my milk. Coincidentally, I met my first goal today! Hopefully this is the start of something!
Monday, September 26, 2011
Our Story
From the first few weeks of my pregnancy, I knew I would deliver early. It wasn't something a doctor told me, just a feeling that she would come before it was time. I guess you could call it my first experience of mother's intuition.
Strangely enough, I was obsessed with breastfeeding. The whole concept is completely amazing to me. I read every single post on message boards about breastfeeding and bought countless books about the subject on Amazon. Anything I could get my hands on about the subject was something I wanted to add to my library. I was so excited about the topic, I even considered going back to school to become a lactation consultant after we got out of the baby stage. Although we have all heard that breastfeeding is hard, I was sure I would be able to make it work, I would make sure that nothing would stop me from breastfeeding.
Although I had a relatively easy pregnancy, although it was spotted with one trip to urgent care and two trips to labor and delivery for urinary tract infections. By the time the second L&D visit came around, I was pretty sure I was also leaking amniotic fluid. The nurse convinced me I was leaking urine instead, a common occurrence in late pregnancy. It didn't smell like urine, but she was far more experienced in this than I, so I let it go. I gave birth one week after my night in labor and delivery. I'll never know if it really was fluid or if it was urine but that is quite a coincidence.
Avery was born on July 11, 2011 at 5:08 in the morning weighing 6 pounds 8 ounces. I was 36 weeks when I gave birth. Luckily, Avery didn't need any extra medical care and she was perfectly healthy, just on the small side. Although I tried over and over, she just refused to latch. I was visited daily by the lactation consultants who were also unsuccessful with getting her to stay hooked on for more than a few seconds. The eventually taught me how to feed her using a gloved finger and a syringe filled with formula.
Towards the end of my hospital stay, they encouraged me pump in order to give her every last drop of colostrum and hopefully bring my milk in. For some reason, I was only given the setup to pump one breast at a time. For baby #2, I'll definitely remember to ask for a second one. Trying to pump colostrum on only one side while trying to care for a baby as well as recover from a vaginal delivery was absolutely grueling. My husband had to return to work right away, since with me in the hospital 2/3 of our company workforce was gone. It probably sounds like no big deal to some but the only thing that kept me from being all alone at the hospital was the constant interruption by the nurses. My husband and I considered ourselves lucky - our child who was born one whole month early was as healthy as a horse.
About a week after giving birth, my milk finally came in. By that time, I was relatively sure it wasn't ever going to happen. Again we tried latching without any success. That was fine, I had already decided that she would eat formula instead, but it was like we were given a new albeit more difficult chance at breastfeeding. Exclusively pumping was in the cards for us and I had to make it work. I knew of many moms who did it, I knew it would be hard but I was willing to make anything work at this point.
Every single day became more of a struggle to pump my milk. Exclusively pumping became several extra steps required for each feeding which required time and energy I just didn't have. As the days moved on, I became even more depressed about our situation. Instead of spending time with my beautiful little girl, I was hooked to that machine. I exclusively pumped for one whole month before I decided that she would benefit more by having a happy and sane mother along with formula rather than a depressed mother with breast milk, so I made the switch.
Unfortunately, switching to formula didn't solve the depression issue like I had hoped. As I arrived at my six week postpartum check-up, I knew I had to share this with someone. I cried through my entire appointment, where I was told to begin taking antidepressants and get some counseling.
With help, I am getting better. Over and over again, I kept thinking about how I was supposed to make this work. This was something I wanted so bad for my family and yet we just couldn't get the mechanics right. After deciding that I wasn't going to let this get me down anymore, I tried one more time. It was probably the worst good idea ever, why bother trying now when she seemed to be content with formula. Strangely enough, she latched like she had been doing this since day one.
So, I am now an officially breastfeeding mother.
Strangely enough, I was obsessed with breastfeeding. The whole concept is completely amazing to me. I read every single post on message boards about breastfeeding and bought countless books about the subject on Amazon. Anything I could get my hands on about the subject was something I wanted to add to my library. I was so excited about the topic, I even considered going back to school to become a lactation consultant after we got out of the baby stage. Although we have all heard that breastfeeding is hard, I was sure I would be able to make it work, I would make sure that nothing would stop me from breastfeeding.
Although I had a relatively easy pregnancy, although it was spotted with one trip to urgent care and two trips to labor and delivery for urinary tract infections. By the time the second L&D visit came around, I was pretty sure I was also leaking amniotic fluid. The nurse convinced me I was leaking urine instead, a common occurrence in late pregnancy. It didn't smell like urine, but she was far more experienced in this than I, so I let it go. I gave birth one week after my night in labor and delivery. I'll never know if it really was fluid or if it was urine but that is quite a coincidence.
Avery was born on July 11, 2011 at 5:08 in the morning weighing 6 pounds 8 ounces. I was 36 weeks when I gave birth. Luckily, Avery didn't need any extra medical care and she was perfectly healthy, just on the small side. Although I tried over and over, she just refused to latch. I was visited daily by the lactation consultants who were also unsuccessful with getting her to stay hooked on for more than a few seconds. The eventually taught me how to feed her using a gloved finger and a syringe filled with formula.
Towards the end of my hospital stay, they encouraged me pump in order to give her every last drop of colostrum and hopefully bring my milk in. For some reason, I was only given the setup to pump one breast at a time. For baby #2, I'll definitely remember to ask for a second one. Trying to pump colostrum on only one side while trying to care for a baby as well as recover from a vaginal delivery was absolutely grueling. My husband had to return to work right away, since with me in the hospital 2/3 of our company workforce was gone. It probably sounds like no big deal to some but the only thing that kept me from being all alone at the hospital was the constant interruption by the nurses. My husband and I considered ourselves lucky - our child who was born one whole month early was as healthy as a horse.
About a week after giving birth, my milk finally came in. By that time, I was relatively sure it wasn't ever going to happen. Again we tried latching without any success. That was fine, I had already decided that she would eat formula instead, but it was like we were given a new albeit more difficult chance at breastfeeding. Exclusively pumping was in the cards for us and I had to make it work. I knew of many moms who did it, I knew it would be hard but I was willing to make anything work at this point.
Every single day became more of a struggle to pump my milk. Exclusively pumping became several extra steps required for each feeding which required time and energy I just didn't have. As the days moved on, I became even more depressed about our situation. Instead of spending time with my beautiful little girl, I was hooked to that machine. I exclusively pumped for one whole month before I decided that she would benefit more by having a happy and sane mother along with formula rather than a depressed mother with breast milk, so I made the switch.
Unfortunately, switching to formula didn't solve the depression issue like I had hoped. As I arrived at my six week postpartum check-up, I knew I had to share this with someone. I cried through my entire appointment, where I was told to begin taking antidepressants and get some counseling.
With help, I am getting better. Over and over again, I kept thinking about how I was supposed to make this work. This was something I wanted so bad for my family and yet we just couldn't get the mechanics right. After deciding that I wasn't going to let this get me down anymore, I tried one more time. It was probably the worst good idea ever, why bother trying now when she seemed to be content with formula. Strangely enough, she latched like she had been doing this since day one.
So, I am now an officially breastfeeding mother.
Saturday, September 24, 2011
La Leche League
Do you ever feel like everything is working out perfectly for you? I certainly did when Avery started nursing for the first time and again. Once she started, I knew that I needed to get all the help I possibly could as quickly as humanly possible. This was not an opportunity that I was willing to miss out on because I wasn't able to ask questions to any of the experts. Not only did I call and make an appointment with the lactation department with my doctor's office, I also looked for a La Leche League meeting, the sooner the better. I was certainly surprised to find there was a meeting scheduled in a couple of days and not too far from my house. It was a brand new meeting, a group that only gotten together once before. How perfect!
The morning of the meeting, I got a little lost. Actually more than a little, I was very lost. Lost in a bunch of farmland (is there really that much farmland in Southern California still?). I knew that I was going to be late and I definitely want to be the new girl who shows up ten or fifteen minutes after the meeting had started. I kept going, thinking I'd peek in and if things looked like they were really moving, I'd go home and find another meeting. As luck would have it, the only person who had shown up to the meeting was Melanie the leader. While I didn't get the traditional La Leche League meeting that I expected, I got one on one support and Avery got to show off her skills.
All in all, everything worked out. I'm still going to try to find another meeting for this month because I do want to attend the four part series of the meetings.
The morning of the meeting, I got a little lost. Actually more than a little, I was very lost. Lost in a bunch of farmland (is there really that much farmland in Southern California still?). I knew that I was going to be late and I definitely want to be the new girl who shows up ten or fifteen minutes after the meeting had started. I kept going, thinking I'd peek in and if things looked like they were really moving, I'd go home and find another meeting. As luck would have it, the only person who had shown up to the meeting was Melanie the leader. While I didn't get the traditional La Leche League meeting that I expected, I got one on one support and Avery got to show off her skills.
All in all, everything worked out. I'm still going to try to find another meeting for this month because I do want to attend the four part series of the meetings.
Thursday, September 22, 2011
People think I'm crazy, I'm sure of it. I don't know anyone who has stopped nursing only to begin again. I quit when my little girl was one month old. It was probably one of the most difficult decisions I have ever made. Another month later, I'm at it again.
So, how does one go about the joining the exciting world of relactation? Lots of nursing and pumping with a handful of herbs and some domperidone thrown in there.
So, how does one go about the joining the exciting world of relactation? Lots of nursing and pumping with a handful of herbs and some domperidone thrown in there.
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